Be not afraid

My husband is one of the bravest men I know. As veteran, he spent considerable time in combat zones, and deployed on countless occasions. I remember a few nights before he deployed to Afghanistan, our garage reeked of permethrin (an insecticide). He had to soak his uniforms in a solution of permethrin; the same type that is used for the topical treatment of head lice. At the time, leishmaniasis, which is vectored by sandflies, was a legitimate concern for deploying troops. In fact, two of his troops would later be sent home mid-year due to severe soft tissue necrosis from leishmaniasis.

"I am terrified you will be captured by the Taliban." I remember telling him one night, as the deployment departure date grew nearer, and our conversations broached the subject of mortality.

"What are you most afraid of?" I asked him.

"Spiders. Giant, hairy spiders that hunt in packs." He whispered.

I remember choking on my beer, and trying to check his face in the moonlight for a sign he was joking. He was deadly serious and his face was slightly pale as he uttered his deepest fear; arachnophobia.  I suddenly remembered how he would beg me to kill spiders he found in the house.  How he was adamant that I keep any rescued tarantulas at my office, and not in the house.  I suppose I always knew how much he disliked spiders, but I had no idea that they were more terrifying than going to war.

A few years later, we visited his parents in Texas.  I happened to find a teensy, tiny spider and scooped it up to take it outside.  I met my mother-in-law in the hallway, who was absolutely terrified.  I immediately understood the origins of my husband's arachnophobia.

As parents, we have the opportunity to impart our beliefs on our children.  While I admittedly have a few idiosyncrasies that I would love to spare my children from, arachnophobia is not one of them.  I encourage parents and teachers to "be not afraid" of insects and spiders.  The vast majority will not harm you. Start with small steps, you don't have to touch them, start by simply observing them.  Ask your child what they see the insect doing, and why do they think the insect is doing that behavior.  If your child is old enough, have them keep a journal with their observations in it. If they are young, encourage them to color a picture of what they saw or recount their observations during your dinner conversation. The possibilities are really endless!